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August 6, 2022 3:30 am
This question is often asked of me. Many think because they are a parent, then they're a caregiver. Nurses, CNAs, and other medical personnel - are family caregivers, right?
In this opening monologue from August 6, 2022, we discuss this issue. First and foremost, family caregivers don't receive a paycheck. Then, there are other significant differences.
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That's the value of ownership. Visit Vanguard.com and explore Vanguard advice on the things up at risk from shareholders on the hospital Vanguard services provided by Vanguard advisors, Inc., registered investment in your American family radio earlier this is a family care school of more than 65 million Americans currently serve as a family. You're one of them you are in the right place so will you know I'm a nurse of the character or appear so the caregiver will the activities certainly intersect and there's gonna be a lot of similarities with the family caregivers different was the difference okay until you play just the differences is a family caregiver somebody who voluntarily puts themselves between a chronically impaired, vulnerable Loveland and you put yourself between that person and even worse disaster and you're doing it without pay and use without training. In fact, without a lot of skills prepare for it. But you just doing it because you do it out of love and yeah nurses are have a lot of the same activities CNA's ago. I have a lot of the same activities, home healthcare agent have a lot of the same activities that's a career choice.
That is their job, they get paid for. They don't have to take it home with them unless their family caregiver taking care of somebody home a parent will take care of children to do everything laundry and diapers and everything else a lot of things seem similar but that child is expected to grow up and become more independent in function as a healthy adult. We deal with somebody with a chronic impairment.
Those expectations change. If you have special needs child, for example, you may not be able to look for Little League games normal classroom experiences homecoming dances problems weddings living outside of the home and going on for to have a family of their own. They may not be able to do it with a special needs child.
Some can. Many cannot.
When you're dealing with somebody who was had some type of stroke or some other type of trauma that is happened things are going to get better this side of heaven. And that's the journey for so many people knowing that this is the way it's going to be and we get to learn to adjust our life to it is not necessarily bad, it's different in its challenging and requires different skill sets and different understandings in different activities and requires an adjustment of our minds and our hearts and where does that come from well certainly counseling helps in and there are all kinds of tips along the way, we can learn based on the unique needs of our love one. But what if you do know somebody with an addiction or mental illness. Alcoholism all those kinds of things you learn a lot of tips and dealing with that.
But when you have unpredictable behavior. You have to learn more than just tips or when you have behavior changes. You have to learn more than just tips you can learn things on a core level of who you are as a person is going to change who you are and again that's not a bad thing. It's different and it's challenging and requires outside help that I have discovered in my many many years of doing this that there is help available out there, but a lot of times help coming from people, even counselors pastors so forth.
They don't quite know what to say. There's a language barrier if you will. And there's a desire yeah we people want to help up something that over and over they want to help and they'll do things that are incredibly thoughtful but there is a language barrier where the caregiver doesn't always know what help. Looks like and the ones that are offering help don't always know what help.
Looks like and so it's kind of a hit or miss, think you know your throwing darts, but there's no light on it so you could cut in the dark. You may hit the target but would you be more effective if you actually could see what you throwing darts that if you could see the target 10 years ago this month. I sit down with a very large radio station in Nashville, Tennessee big I heart station that carried all the big talk shows and it brought their music grows big station and I laid out my pitch of what I was trying to accomplish us and wanted a program for caregivers and I sit across the table from Ed executives there, and so forth and program managers and he said you mean like nursing homes said no caregivers. People who are making this decision. People are struggling with the special needs parents and I and I went to the Lydia as it know all and they look to be with kind of a blank look on their face.
They said we don't get resulting.
This is for us is that okay so went to smaller station and they put me on it was a midday once a week on Wednesday and I went down there and they it was a very small station. I think I could reach more people if I got out my backyard yelled. But that's okay. I didn't and I went and did it for Internet months and then the bigger station, Colby W.
Lacey their national 1510 and they called me they said we would listen to your program. We get it and we think there's a place for you here and so went on to that station and did it for eight years and then American family radio graciously extended the invitation for me to come on this network. They say we get this we started doing this on a much larger scale than other networks picked up the show Truth Network his radio to many, many others affiliate started picking up the program because he saw the neat that individuals who are caring for these chronically impaired. Love once and I don't care what the impairment is to get it could be autism. It could be addiction. It could be Alzheimer's. Doesn't matter is always a chronic impairment. There's always caregiver and they recognize that the ones who are taking care of these people in whatever way they could were in desperate need of someone to speak to them in a way they could understand and those caregivers were in desperate need of being able to learn the vocabulary of what help. Looks like this whether the program I remember spending literally decades doing this the first 20 years of my caregiving journey, struggling, and nobody really knew what to say to me, nobody knew how to approach me think they tried they were very sincere. They love me. They wanted to care for me but it couldn't penetrate in what I call that fog of caregivers that fear that obligation that guilt that we live with this caregivers and they didn't know how to say things that that got through that and I did know how to penetrate out of that fog and speak it away due to to clearly ask for a buddy I could identify mold coordinates and it took a lifetime for me to wrestle through this and a member how lonely was how frustrating it was and how resentful I became and how discouraged I became somewhat a set up to do this program that's what I keep in mind because I know that I'm not the only, and that there are so many more who are struggling with these things that I want them to be able to hear the way they can understand what the gospel looks like in this sounds like you can wrap your arms right of what it means to trust God with this.
I want them to see a clear defined path to safety, even if just for today. For this moment and I wanted to be able to help others to be able to reach into the hardening of caregivers to be elbows deep into it and communicate clearly, take that sincere desire that they had in Marriott with understanding isolation is one of the most crippling things we as caregivers face and it's not just physical isolation is the emotional and spiritual isolation that we struggle this program is going into that isolation with the clear message of the gospel bill people understand what it means to trust in God.
Through this dispute arose part of this is hope for the cure