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September 29, 2019 4:00 pm
Will Hardy continues the discussion of where God fits in a marriage.
This is the Truth Network welcome to man talk to you by T8 W CM is talking and walking 15 men's ministry where there devoted to breaking down the walls of race, age, and challenging them to take their God assigned as our host will Hardy and Roy Jones Junior, a black guy and a white guy and talk radio and you know are last to show talking about conflict resolution between husband and wife, and some the things that you can do in order to resolve this conflict that ultimately you will have in your relationship. So I was talking with a couple couples who actually listen to the first show and they say were passed. Are you going to say anything about wives and submission because you know a lot of people have problems with with that and so I want to begin by we talk a little bit about that on the part two of of this husband and wife, conflict resolution, but I want to go into a little bit more detail today and give you some Scripture references in reference to it because having respect for the authority of the word of God is key in bringing conflict to a point to be resolved in Jesus Christ and see you don't want to go around and continue to have focus just continuously focus on the problem you want to turn your attention focus on a biblical solution and we said in part one and again in part two of the Bible has answers for us.
We just have to know where to look for these answers. But in Ephesians chapter 5 verses 22 to 24 it talks about the wife submitting to her husband, as unto the Lord, and when I was talking with these two couples you know I shared with them that one of the main things that's not happening of when it comes to men and women is understanding their role as a leader in the husband in the home and the wife understanding what her role is, but society has taken these roles and they have injected so much pollution, if you will, into what the Bible says in that we should be doing as man and and how we should resolve conflict as husband and wife, and they have turned around and now you have the roles reversed. In some instances and that is basically a recipe for disaster. So when God talks about submitting the wife submitting to her husband, as unto the Lord. If that man knows Christ and he is born again, and his desire is to do what the will of God says that he should be doing as the leader in that home, and if the wife sees this then she's going to come alongside and support him.
But we said, in part to this that if that husband who is who might be unsaved because you have situations where you have an husband or wife who is unsaved and then all of a sudden one gets saved and the other one don't so you know Anat has a note on another set of issues altogether, but if that husband truly truly is submitting himself unto God and the wife sees that she will definitely come alongside. So when we talked on part two of this, we said that a woman should not do anything that her husband tells her to do that goes against the word of God, or causes her to sin against God because God is won't support a person who is committing sin or using his word to establish some type of overarching authority in the home more than what God has allowed that man to be because if if a man knows that hey, I'm headed home and you supposed be doing what I say, then you know this is not the will of God, you come alongside and so loving your wife husband's will cause her to submit to you so let me give you. Colossians chapter 3 begin beginning with verse number 12. Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility and meekness, long-suffering, bearing one another and forgiving one another.
Notice that verse 13 forbearing one another, and forgiving one another. C.
So if you're concentrating more on the problem or who's to blame and you're not focus on the biblical solution, then all you going to do is focus on the problem and never reached the biblical solution so bearing one another. Understanding the points that are made within the relationship. If the husband is bringing up an issue in the wife is bringing up up up an issue. Listen to it and any says, forgiving one another. If anyone has a complaint against another, even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do and see.
That's command we must forgive. Now we were talking earlier I was talking earlier 221 of the producers and you know we said that a person can forgive but see as humans we sometimes don't forget, and so when something within that relationship triggers you to remember something that you supposed to have forgiven your husband or forgiving your wife about and now you bringing it back up again and then the question is, did you really forgive them, or are you using that as simply as a tool to say whenever you make me upset whenever you make me angry. Now I'm going to go to my box of of angry things pull out this that have been five, 10 years ago and you throw it up and in one's face. And again this is not bearing, being humble, being kind.
Being meek, long-suffering, or forbearing one another, and he goes on to say in verse 14.
But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection and we know that we are not perfect because if we were doing, we would need Jesus but we understand that because we are not perfect.
We submit ourselves to the one who is perfect within us. So when we submit to Christ who dwells within us, just as Jesus said the father is in me and I am in him. So, if Christ is in us and we are in Christ, then as long as we submit to that perfect one then we are walking in perfection.
We are not perfect, but we are walking in perfection because we are submitting to the one who is perfect and in verse 15 he says and let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you are called in one body. And be thankful.
So the peace of God can reign.
Once you recognize and realize that if we have a problem and we are admitting we have a problem. We don't want to continue to talk in detail about why this particular problem arrived. We just know it's here. Let's deal with it. Let's go to God, let's go to the word of God and if we can't find resolution then let us go to a pastor who is grounded in the truth because we talked about that on the first show he said, let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, that's verse number 16 teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord and whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
So having a heart of humility and having an openness to the truth of God.
It gives us an avenue to God so that we can cast our cares on him because we were never meant to carry these things and then in verse 18.
He says wives submit to your own husbands, as is fitting to the Lord. But see, you have to do all of the things in verses number 12 to 17. Before you come down and you submit yourselves to your own husband.
You have to come in in humbleness.
You have to be that mix. Don't wait for him to be meek or don't wait for her to be meek, you show meekness, you shall humbleness you show the grace that God has given and put in your heart and you be the one who stepped forward and let that which God has given you begin to manifest in and through you, so that whatever point that they are at. It will bring that anger, that portion of anger and hostility.
It'll bring it under control of the Holy Spirit. And in verse 19 he says husbands love your wives and don't be bitter towards them so we would come and appear on a break, but I want to pick that up when we get back from the break because you know their commands to husbands and they are commands to wives and each one of them needs to understand the critical thing about relationships is understanding your role in if you've never ever understand your role as a wife or ex-husband.
How can you submit yourself to God in a godly way because conflict will exist will be right back after the break to your CMM would love to have you join their community of men for breakfast every first and third Friday of every month and Bible discussions and fellowship at the best breakfast in town meeting location is at their voracious poster First Christian Church encouraged 1130 N. Main St. encouraged him a hard start at 7 o'clock on a hard stop at 8 o'clock. First time visitors eat for free. Join your host will party and Roy Jones Junior, a black guy in a white guy of affordable chiropractic in High Point. As you might tell from their name, affordable chiropractic, even for the castration. Dr. Jeff Ricky has been caring for patients in High Point for 34 years, physical therapy, such as ultrasound and spinal decompression for this condition, such as herniation conference of care for auto accident injury patients with no out-of-pocket expense. Remember, affordable chiropractic on the W. Lexington Ave. in High Point Hall 336-885-1987 back to Mantell radio and when we left off. We were talking about the submission because submission is taking out of context and society has literally reversed everything that the Bible has taught in reference to what it means for one to submit to their spouse. And I mean we could just take a show just talking about that but see, once you get past the point of each one of you.
Understanding number one what your role is number two faced a problem and admit if you have any part with in causing one to sin or if you're setting yourself then admit that and then go to God in prayer.
See the word of God for an answer to whatever it is you're going through and then understand and respect the word of God as the authority in your life and if you don't want to ask you know except the word of God as short authority, then you have to look at yourself in and ask am I truly a born-again believer because the the word of God must reign supreme. It must, it must be the deciding thing within our lives that we have to hold onto and see man when you when you talk about love like Jesus love the church and you should love you what you got to show her you got that you gotta have acts of love in your relationship and this means that you have to have a concern for not only the people within your household but you have to have a concern for others and all of the file. Jesus, he illustrated his love for the church and if we model the love that Jesus had for the church, then we can overcome a lot of what we are faced with. But this love concerning the well-being of others. Love. This is it's isn't selfish and all that's first Corinthians 13 five it doesn't seek its own. Love works not to harm anyone.
So if you and we talked about this in in the first part if you using your tongue is poison. Then what you're doing is you are harming your spouse more instead of being a voice to help him when he's down in the valley and husbands. Likewise help your wives when they're down in the valley because love is a choice. It's a choice of your will, you have to choose to love and you know we can we can choose to love one another or not. Just as we can choose not to obey the Scriptures and the commandment of God. So the question is this, what are you going to do when conflict starts. You know, are you going to respond in such a way that causes her to be more incited with wrath or anger because the primary responsibility of the husband is to initiate love to your wife. You have to be the initiator of that love. And since, but if you're in conflict and you haven't, you continue continuously looking at the problem instead of the biblical solution. You never arrive at it. Mantis he's commanded to to love into the relationship, just as Christ loved the church.
In Romans chapter 5 verses 6 to 8 Christ loved us while we were yet sinners and hidden levels just because we were lovable.
No, he chose to do so because this is something that needed to be done in order to reconcile us back onto God. So God sent his son because we can't save ourselves and see that's love and and if we model that same type of love then we would be ever so grateful. And every day we wake up to say, God, I'm going to coming here I'm going to love my wife and I'm going to give her a compliment. I'm going to tell her what a great job she's doing with the children. Thank you for preparing that mail or getting the house done or even working and coming home and doing some things after work. All of these things we should be thankful and grateful for. So if you are having difficulties. Why don't you simply just just ran out a list right out of a list man of all of the things your wife has done that you have not on a regular basis just praised her for an's and thanked her for an and likewise wives if you listening. We want you to do the same thing because giving the giving of yourself to each other is showing the essence of the love of Christ that is placed within each and one of you love should be express by what we say and it should also be express by what we do, we just can't have lipservice to say oh you know I love you and I thank you for this and we say at all casually and cavalierly without having any type of feeling behind and I think if you have been married long enough you know in your spouse know when you're just kind of you know, just okay.
I'm just going tell her it is because she needs to hear today but not with much feeling not coming out and simply saying you know I just love you for who you are and just grab that woman grab that woman and give her a plan, a big wet one right on and say you know you are so beautiful to me. You are the one that I adore and you inspire me to continue to be the best man I can for this particular family just got away and do it. You know you if you write in the car right now. Well don't don't plan a bit when only if you ride in the car but just wait to you park somewhere and implant the big one on her and just tell her how much you love her how much you adore her. How much you appreciate what she's done for you and wives you reciprocate. Just don't let him do everything you jump in thereto and say hey you know my man does.
That's right tell tell your friends about your man and let them inspire be inspired by what you are saying concerning him because he man every now and then. They may not admit it but you know they need their Eagles pump just a little bit.
Well maybe a little bit more, but that they needed pumped so that they need to be encouraged. If you get out there with a hammer a nail and he all of a sudden he do some handyman project in and fix something for you just give them just applauded and say thank you for fixing that step because you know that could've been a hazard that could've been something you know we go out to take the trash and all of a sudden we trip over to Stepan and we fall down because we knew you never ever want to in the day unless you tell her thank you and praise her for something and and don't be ashamed because you know, man.
Sometimes we're not as sentimental as the woman is but and and and you know that the flowers in the candy. You know that's that's okay. But you know that's, old huntress, I'm just going tell you mantis test that's old you got to come out the candy in the flower box you got to be creative.
Your wife wants you to be unique and what that means is to do something for her that you haven't done before, so inspire should do something different now you know ultimately if we ever talk about sex, you know now you not going to do anything to each other. That's going to be painful or or one. That's if she objected to something that you want to do don't do it because everything that you do even when it comes down to being intimate to each other. It has to be mutual. It must be mutual. You cannot have an imbalance when it comes to things like this one wanting to do it and one not wanting to do it because you never want to get to that big D. Word you don't want to get there and what that big D. Word is his divorce. You don't want to go there sometimes it's inevitable. But we need to do everything that we possibly can.
Not to go down that road, because if you did what you supposed to do when you said, I do then you should do that for life and I tell you I just a little bit guy we only got less than a minute to go, but my wife of 32 years went on to be with the Lord cannot tell you it was a joy to have her for as long as I did and I'm just thankful for all that she's done when it came to our family, our children, raising them staying home with them when she put her career on hold so men be be an example get out of the box.
Don't stay in their do something differently be an encouragement.
God is waiting for you today so we thank you and listen to another show of mantle and we hope that you join us again for our nation. Thank you and God bless. We wrap up today show. Be assured that DAW CMM talking and walking Christian men's ministry is building a community of men Christ followers with a desire to be servant leaders in their homes, communities, churches and work environments.
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