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44- Healing the Healers

The Cure / Aimee Cabo
The Truth Network Radio
September 12, 2019 2:00 pm

44- Healing the Healers

The Cure / Aimee Cabo

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September 12, 2019 2:00 pm

On today's show, Aimee talks with Dr. Nikolov and guest Rev. Matthew Crebbin about a program and documentary series called "Healing the Healers.''

THE CURE Live streamed podcast is hosted by Aimee Cabo and offers a platform of hope to anyone who has experienced domestic violence, abuse, mental illness, any trauma or is experiencing problems now in their lives. It's a place to find comfort, knowledge, strategies, answers, hope and love while healing the wounds and 'affirming' that you are not alone.  

Join Aimee and her professional guests on  The Cure with Aimee Cabo podcast    every Saturday at 1 PM EST   as it is recorded during the live radio show.

You can find information about the show and past guests by visiting the  RADIO SHOW PAGE.

You can also view the weekly  Video podcasts  on Apple Podcasts.  

Aimee hopes that anyone who has suffered abuse of any kind, or walked a moment in similar shoes, will find inspiration in these pages, and hope that love and truth will ultimately prevail. Please subscribe and share this podcast.

Aimee Cabo Nikolov is a Cuban American who has lived most of her life in Miami. After many years of healing, finding love, raising a family and evolving her relationship with God, Aimee's true grit and courage led her to pen an honest, thought-provoking memoir. Years of abuse became overshadowed with years of happiness and unconditional love. Now Aimee is the president of IMIC Research, a medical research company, a speaker, radio host and focused on helping others. You can read more about Aimee by  visiting her website.
Dr. Boris Nikolov is the CEO of Neuroscience Clinic. You can read more about Dr. Nikolov and the work he is doing by  visiting his website.


Rev. Matthew Crebbin has been a Senior Minister at Newtown Congregational Church since 2007. Since the events at Sandy Hook Elementary School on December 14, 2012, Rev. Crebbin has worked with a broad coalition of faith leaders to built burgess of understanding and compassion between diverse communities affected by trauma.

Healing the Healers is a journey of short conversations, following Crebbin as he explores the long-term effects of this type of trauma on faith leaders, and a mission to help educate and prepare them to serve when a future trauma lands in their community. The series asks the question: when crisis strikes, we run to faith leaders for healing and comfort - but, who helps the healers? You can learn more about Rev Matthew and Healing the Healers by visiting the website at

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Lawsuit the cure with Amy Koppel, life can bring many difficult situations domestic violence addictions, poverty and even sexual abuse by your loved ones welcome Amy Koppel and Q things day capital and its share. We are like every Saturday at 1 PM Eastern Nathan to last line on the radio here.

Please download it from the app store listening teeny live on Route that your channel we started light streaming around fire TV or an angry TV all God's or later.

Listen to the recorded shells be any podcast. I'm also joined by Dr. Boyce, Nicola, who is my partner at work and in life.

Hello this show deals with the suffering and the tenacity of the human spirit. The will to survive in the carriage to keep moving forward despite any obstacle with the help of God and each other.

We do provide testimonials to let people know that they're not alone in this show.

The testimony started with me having been a survivor from child abuse well into adulthood. We also have professionals in the medical field and inspirational speakers that are willing to help and can get that information because education is key. Transparency is needed and I believe we can help each other for me. My feeling came from God, but other forms of healing are presented as well to service everyone life can be very challenging.

But always know we are not alone and today I witnessed discuss about healing the healers and today special guest is Raven. Matthew Crabb better not to Crabb and it's exploring the long terms of fact of mass casualty trauma on faith leaders and is on a mission to help educate and prepare them to serve when a future trauma lands in their community that is the senior pastor of mutant Congregational church and has served as community after the tragic mass shooting at Sandy help elementary school.

She and other faith leaders have to look to each other for their own personal support emotionally, spiritually and physically. Raven Cambron is the host of the documentary series by Odyssey impact sealing the healers this series, ask questions when crisis strikes, we run to our faith leaders for healing and comfort but who helped who helps the healers and the sociality that displays it reveals the concept that we sometimes fall and we feel like we need more always searching and in good times we look for change when in bad times we feel ourselves. So when tragedy hits.

How do we keep it together when having to help others. Despite help ourselves. Raven Craven thank you for being on the show. Thank you for being in the care on the honor is ours. Rev. got you into the ministry. If you could just let us know little bit about what what was the road that led you to become a pastor were I grew up California Bay Area on and I was really grew up in the church. In our local congregation. My father's mother if she met at the church where I grew up young adult ministry and family group.

I didn't have anyone in my family been will be my recent history who had been clergy or ministers, but I did get my car you think about ministry, I didn't really think about the path I was going to take the night after college summer after my I graduated from college and that experience really led me to my call Congregational room that I had a number three.

Like all my group did not yield those God could you and then zero years later, no after what I would seminary nearly 25 years ago. It really was out of the period from trauma to school that initial calling around our community is how God used great finds its way into a trauma is really an experience and reminder to a place of brokenness are places where God most work throughout the period experienced on December 14, 2012 then was it shortly after you had become a past chair in the ministry that must've been very challenging yet no actually I 12 years New Hampshire I've been pastor your Newtown or 6 1/2 years. I think it is so after I you know that third years in Rhode Island part ministry. People who affected by violent pastor through several incidents affected by homicide suicide, other tragic circumstance, but nothing on the scale of must be so hard to comprehend impact Sandy Hook on you community what impact it has on you and other faith leaders need yet so you know it was many about local clergy responded our journey with our you know you very much overwhelmed nothing that I collect train for in terms of how you deal with the incident of of such mass trauma that really impact the hope you have both directly impacted families who lost loved ones with folks you know experience just terrific. Both hearing and seeing just awful thing is responders children, teachers and staff others in the course ripples so I think that where it really walk sometimes we think of pastoral care clergy as something where you are dealing with a family or an individual, but here we really listing the impact of the ripple that were impacting so many are 27,000 people congregation 400+ but but that you know that community with support and caring and super clergy. It was you. I think were trained necessarily to think in the way that no know we are seeing more and more communities affected by natural disasters, human made disasters all kind annually at your own story talk you know the real people come through our doors. This may not talk about the trauma that they in their childhood and young adulthood, but who themselves are being impacted and not train clergy or become more aware of how trauma impact there would be less helpful. Both of them and also to ourselves certainly is healing you talk about your part of this.

How do you navigate for yourself and make sure that this that you're able to be a resource for others is created and found resources and support was helpful in almost last helping others and I basically turn to God because nothing elsewhere. And there's different, and throws can be very challenging and he can be scary and the only thing that gets me any hope at all because nothing's again is the fact that there's a God and and I just put my trust in it. That must've been very devastating for the whole community and how we a better fit. Bring all those people together and the clergy that was working within the community. They must've felt the violent I mean God must've had a hand in almost certain you think that I think one thing that many people have a dramatic communal event that there is so many people disempowered. One of the viewfinder belt you going back by responding by helping others by gathering and finding that I mean Bill and this is a share will continue talking to Matthew short break.

Welcome back to this elephant is tightening in the Mikado, and if this is your first when talking about healing the healers find Canada's lonely time in mind and I making it sometimes seem unfair that he reminds me of how fundable can be what it is to have a relationship with God. Especially when it becomes too much.

We are joined by Rev. Mackey, cretin and grabbing why you think pastors are hesitant to ask for help. Why do you think is the culture we often don't take the emotional and mental health needs of faith leaders into consideration great. What I think that many clergy we know we are look to and we believe that we're the resource where the well everyone can you know draw spiritual resort and we want to be available to offer that were challenging for clergy to admit that there that they themselves are vulnerable or ill feeling felt overwhelmed or dried out by the challenge is especially true in crisis moment especially like that can be presented by disasters or patches returned to I had wonderful resource for me early on.

They fit me you want to think the clergy will do in situations like this. Stay well. Things are really bad now, but I need to take care of other things for myself and my family, but they will make it through the week.

Then I'll take care of that we can come and you say well I don't know I'm in all you know in a month. All pictures that are in disasters still allow your compounding challenge come from trauma events or disasters that there's net there's always more. Always that you can recognize Doing so, clergy will put off that character they want to be that resource and know their are other relationships with family and others funds on whole because they want to be present to an available for overwhelming good. I got up I described the altar of the good, and that's where you know so much good that needs to be done responsibly want to have that sometimes we sacrifice ourselves our own relationship. Other relationships important so the question pastor. It's that selfless act that we all nice fitting others before ourselves, mother stealing and stealing all the time and sometimes we are there sometimes more were more concerned about being there for others that we sometimes tend to forget ourselves and we tend to forget our families are all equal in the eyes of God. Aren't our families, ourselves and the people we are helping just as important shipment we can all the aspects equal after sure, you forget that you love the Lord your God our strength love your neighbor as yourself.

I love thinking and yet threefold love God and neighbor don't have that all that Rick ordered that love love Carico and the need in order to manifest the love we have for God. Other take that on as you well know, very often sometime were different reason sacrifice that we shouldn't just be self-love or self-centered down the other ways in which we can become self-centered that only energy you know your neighbor work for other and and I even forgot that that we can lose track of need for making sure that that our own as you are your mind made in the image that our own, our own beauty, God created revelation will board honor that yet that anyone thought perversion don't keep it in balance but I think that down with helping ministry rear we wanted to step you think God wants to be just to to ourselves as we are to others and I just wanted to make a point because I know that sometimes people say well to give and help others. I need to take care of myself first, I need to help myself first will not understand that in the process of helping others. You are also helping yourself dynamically. Not an either or I only do this right, only bigger myself and it really net profit were helping out with that. You know when were helping others.

Actually, for many people who been in that situation situation is actually care for others or doing other being felt actually is empowering you help make it through the trauma make find our way through the disaster itself because were able to be built were empowered to do something very often. Disasters are by their nature overwhelmed.

This community is important for all theater news that hurts people out on what you take on a lot of people. That sent me a desire to wallow in what felt like help with, and so springboard recognized in the power of our relationship.

We know we learned very early on why people do go back to churches and faith. Incident of, natural disaster may disaster like ours. Many people come back, gathering Sunday morning worship gathering wanted to be whether people want to make connection to honor relations found each other so obviously sometimes within the biggest tragedies you can see the greatest love is what I've noticed. Can you tell me what's the heart behind the CVs ceiling. The healers right and that would people can go and learn more about. But the series was really created because we did wanted to have a a training video things you need to know could make something very dry noted information only. Information base we really wanted to have conversation while people to share their story faith leaders of their own their own struggle. So that's really what it is no because it's important because sharing your story and sharing your experience. You don't know who you helping someone a sense we can all be healers and arms.

You know, we can all be healers and the I think the idea would be for us to be there for each other to heal each other because I think that's what God intended and that's that's what we are meant to do things for joining I Mimi capital and this is they can't even listen to us every Saturday at 1 PM Eastern radio to care channel the care: God is, he cannot come as a podcast.

I love that song.

I believe that it's God or someone that will not see that says put your hand in mine. The one that wants to be with you a lot of time thinking of how much trend locked can be such a peaceful feeling Wittgenstein conversation with Raven that happened about healing the heaters that rent and that documentary series stealing the healers. Can you discuss with us some topics that are discussed.

The week have a number of conversation typically leader and we or really partly their own personal story own intersection with trauma, and and how that impacted them well in their ministry.

You know, we look at issues like how you can talk you out of the look at their own care. Find here other, their communities know they were in a local congregation by that response. Look at how they impact that, for some of them no. Three substantial your trauma, but a number of your journey Ben. I think that many of us. I've been on this journey like you were a few years conversation with no a Jewish cancer We stop you experience trauma on the job first responder The 9/11. So what it's like.

It's so all the religions getting our others only one God, yeah, I know I am informed by Mary Patty Jewish rabbi Christian seminary and you would always ask why are you seminary default story of how you with the World War II you would on the front line when the injured soldiers who are facing basically the end of their life. You would call a chaplain you know he and his RESPONSE to wherever they were needed in those moments, he pointed out that they now are you Catholic priest.

Are you the product you know you were the. The response care.

God you are able other death violent neck that shape you all need to recognize that you need connection between all people have the Christian because because of so you not one, but I think I think, does you find I find myself closer to different faith tradition mass, probably better than that because weekly sure,.

Interestingly, that sometimes I might feel to others who may be a part of the tradition. Because, you know that's true military veteran is one thing but you really will be able to have conversation on very very important logical structure very often be sure, I'll believe that everything a person here reading God's love is only one religion only comes in one farm and it doesn't matter where from and from and I think that's the underlying factor, yet were all I can access all line in different degrees over matter interpretation everything else yet in the end with the neighbor.

It's great that he took into account the healers because they're so busy being there for others in healing others and know things about the person who's doing the healing Galveston depressions okay but sometimes that person needs to be consideration to and it's nice that you bring this to light that you documentarian about this because it is difficult for them to admit that they can be that they can be hard as well when they're busy trying to help others and this is something that they can look at any can be very therapeutic. I believe is really important you. I think we made that I did art field.

Unfortunately, you number of natural disaster like wildfire, hurricane, other kind human made after mass shooting other kind relation, minute after they cleared organ to be called upon to serve in the situation and I think you know we have been less than many of them there, like me, have not been trained. Intron the different thing than what many pastors are trained to deal so I know are wrong formation and awareness about trauma and hopefully get more people we have resource material that supplemental video college e.g. do you have psychological I mean this is saying before you know for me. I look back over my own ministry recognize that there were people looking through my doors of my church different times in my ministry of traumatized recognize the time being, I did have that field that I realized that my ministry would let able to be helpful if I had more awareness. The more that were trying to do this. It is many quote one and other denominational other regional focus. Others where you and more in-depth training and resource available to our clergy work in communities that are more than likely either Apple and their and faith already been traumatized, or find himself in the situation with her having you there disaster impacting their whole communities want them to have skill awareness so hopefully they'll be able to navigate that the people I know that all were administered to help people and to really make a difference in the lives of the people to show the love of God, care and compassion that we know are deeply rooted in our faith, but overdue that fortunately many of us did not well informed just don't have the resources trying to do off the way. But I also charge the whole judges do more to prevent some of those mass shootings.

Let's say somebody that is that is trouble doesn't know what to do yet, but I think that yeah I mean if you're looking at and you know I think we have of anger.

You know country that many of these human made that you will filing that mass shooting.

Maybe God in our lives. The doctrines of all kinds expression of rage that that right and I think that you bake leader that local community. How do we help the nurture and in both, you eventually piety would also need to build community of compassion and love. Talk about know that say no rate now now was now Jesus said love, and love one another as you left me. That's exactly what I remember when we are back to continue talking to read a map to credit any capital and the care and thanks for being my best, Amy Amy, and is the care you can ever sign at 1 PM Eastern radio Next year on Roku foreign God is, he cannot come. We are joined by Matthew Capt. talking about healing the healers. Dr. Bevington Matthew Crabb and made a documentary about healing the heaters and this song lay back and relax. I like to believe I'm next to God. Everything will be okay. We hope to have that one person in our life that makes it all right, so his God and live in the past and enjoy them so I love that song lay back in my last basically enjoy the ride.

Divide of life. Trust God and trust his direction because as long as you control whatever is meant to be it will be some just let it be that in graphic reference twister for me to say rather inquiring I felt I just know you have friends had is that okay so we were talking about that healing the healers documentary series and I wanted to ask you, what would you like what do you hope that churches and pastors and Christians in general will take away after watching the what take-home message you would omit that is an area that more and more to be responding to a different way and that many about that are in Delaware how trauma work. One of the shooting was that we have a lot of very well. Earlier want to help you get one third other That wanted to help year and actually they didn't know much about trauma. I don't think they were as helpful as they could be in some cases were actually left people to and thought I really important for the leader to become more informed about how, impact visual community and you not learn everything you can rely I don't and that is important then when you need help at work and look for resources and also develop the resources when your local community through regional and even denominationally make sure that people are getting the kind of the yeah is it any mass using these days. There's so many tragedies it can apply to anybody build unfortunately in the literature for many clergy it's not a question of if this will happen when and yeah will you be able to be prepared and they will become experts in trauma. None of, unless we go on the study. Many many years will have the expertise of the know everything we need to know what we need to know what we don't. I like it yes you want to be helpful surgeon like somebody coming in off the street think hey on the minute do surgery surgery with a butter knife. You know, and in thinking that they're going to take care of somebody when they don't really have the tool that they need her and the knowledge. And so that's why there's just been not a lot of another, without not been a lot of resources provided clergy to get inside that they need to know so that they can go. That's why we go to on Thursday, you'll know, find our way know I wish I had known you know before You got a divorce.

I did go something I hope help some people to get more of that before and then I pray that no don't ever have to use it, but they do pray that will be helpful to them.

They can, you know, show forth the best way possible. God love and compassion that really need multiple you know like position that not only do we show love and care, but that we do no harm. Sometimes people can be well-intentioned but actually end up doing more harm to people vulnerable and broken by trauma because they don't know Mike need and how the people so truly important is this must be difficult for my daughter was almost never had anyone dying.

I think that that must be the most difficult suffering. Anyone can go with you and is there any way that we can pray for you guys and the families need 10 any of the families of mass shootings that have been a caring or tragedies or environment you pray for families who lost loved ones. You like that their loved ones are going to be forgotten and and and as much of anything else. The don't want people to know taking charge of or control over our remember they don't want to. Prayer is a powerful thing. I believe it in prayer remembrance and prayer that will people not in your loved one know, I think, is that people want to forget they don't want to want to remember the member. The beauty of that they need to trauma and integrating that into the new life does know there's no going back been traumatized.

Don't go back. Ability to do is integrate you as you had into a life that what I call a higher wisdom that integrate all of that law that that brokenness into a way that the that doesn't forget about it no longer has power but is not not forgetting that you so very powerful.

Remembering those who are going through this and knowing the long you people still appreciate prayers you always years later it's an ongoing journey during the year two years three years or four years is a lifetime journey. There is joy along the way celebration, if not all law borrowed that but it is an ongoing chart we appreciate all all the prayers people and you know I still get folks to let me know the different feet sure happy to offer (let's pray cheerfully angry God, love, compassion, old every moment of our lives.

Pray for every person who is been affected by the disaster who lost loved one themselves broken and battered by violent instruction. We pray that they may not know that they are not alone. Your love that our law love that is not always realize broken term is there and that you will help each one of us to continue mindful of how we can provide support and encouragement of those who are on a journey of a lifetime left them on those journey left all the family here in Newtown to continue on their journey, but also blessed those around this country and around themselves are experiencing. Even in this moment new trauma nubile. May your love them, guide them on their journey towards the love I pray in the name. You probably we all might know, like this day and every day. You always are sorry like so reverently coming up to the end of the shell.

Is there anything you would any other thoughts you would like to share with our listeners got one. I would just you know about your your listening and you know of that great leader.

You think might might benefit from knowing about resource for you know you're involved with denominational work or other work that you take a and we hope that it will be helpful to to as many people that no one trauma or disaster might come to church and not feel folks there understandably will play a little deeper level. What it means to be going and they might let love. Thank you. Kind of stinky cell lines. For more information on mapping Matthew and his work can be found on God's under gas. Please check out the documentary series ceiling heaters. I would like to send this with the following don't quit when things go wrong sometimes well when the village charging teams have when the funds that you know that I want to smile you have to sign when I was passing me down. Rest in my last complaint fact that this failure turned inside out to fill the tank up clouds of doubt and you can never tell how close you are a may be mere when it comes on so stick to the fight when you hug his head when things go wrong, that you must not, this is Amy capital and I

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