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27- How Failing Leads to Success

The Cure / Aimee Cabo
The Truth Network Radio
June 16, 2019 7:57 pm

27- How Failing Leads to Success

The Cure / Aimee Cabo

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June 16, 2019 7:57 pm

On today's show, Aimee talks with Dr. Nikolov and guest Arnie Malham about how failing often leads people to success.

THE CURE Live streamed podcast is hosted by Aimee Cabo and offers a platform of hope to anyone who has experienced domestic violence, abuse, mental illness, any trauma or is experiencing problems now in their lives. It's a place to find comfort, knowledge, strategies, answers, hope and love while healing the wounds and 'affirming' that you are not alone.  

Join Aimee and her professional guests on  The Cure with Aimee Cabo podcast    every Saturday at 1 PM EST  as it is recorded during the live radio show.

You can find information about the show and past guests by visiting the  RADIO SHOW PAGE.

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Aimee hopes that anyone who has suffered abuse of any kind, or walked a moment in similar shoes, will find inspiration in these pages, and hope that love and truth will ultimately prevail. Please subscribe and share this podcast.

Aimee Cabo Nikolov is a Cuban American who has lived most of her life in Miami. After many years of healing, finding love, raising a family and evolving her relationship with God, Aimee's true grit and courage led her to pen an honest, thought-provoking memoir. Years of abuse became overshadowed with years of happiness and unconditional love. Now Aimee is the president of IMIC Research, a medical research company, a speaker, radio host and focused on helping others. You can read more about Aimee by  visiting her website.
Dr. Boris Nikolov is the CEO of Neuroscience Clinic. You can read more about Dr. Nikolov and the work he is doing by  visiting his website.


Arnie S. Malham is the author of Worth Doing Wrong: The Quest To Build A Culture That Rocks, and founder/president of An entrepreneur and speaker who focuses on improving work cultures, Malham previously built and sold two successful businesses — cj Advertising, which became the largest full-service brand-building agency in the U.S. exclusively for law firms; and a call center, Legal Intake Professionals. He was selected by the Nashville Business Journal as an award winner for Most Admired CEO’s and Best in Business. You can read more about Arnie by visiting his website at

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Kabul is brought to you by volume only see search life can bring many difficult situations, domestic violence, addictions, poverty and even sexual abuse by your loved ones welcome, Amy, and Q and things. I'm your host, here I created this out for me and he said that there is hope after going to difficulties no matter what type I'm trying to use testimonials to the effect and inviting professionals and speakers that can help with suggestions as a survivor. I hope to inspire others encourage transparency and strength.

Knowing that those who suffer alone, those that heal against unsurmountable odds do access.

I'm here joined by poisoning hello hi thanks for having some of us suffer from feeling like a failure.

I had to make mistakes to learn the lesson well and when I got it wrong.

I learned how to do it right every time I fell I learned to get back up again and came back better.

I had to fail to foster the desire to keep on going today to talk about how to use your mistakes to succeed. Today's guest is Arnie mouth. Arnie Mohammed is out there for doing wrong. The quest to build the culture that rocks and found a president that better book an entrepreneur and speaker who focuses on improving work cultures my home. Sleep built and sold to successful businesses. CJ advertising, which became the largest full-service brand building agency in the US exclusively for law firms and a call center legal intake professionals. He was selected by the Nashville business Journal as an award winner for the most admired CEOs and the best in business. Now, that you repeatedly got it wrong in all aspects of running a business mistakes piston and his companies forward. Ultimately, he operated two highly successful businesses. He also says you've got to be willing to get it wrong on your way to get it right, you can discuss with us how companies can build more freethinking created coaches by being unafraid of failure in seeing Ayres a step towards solutions thus had made mistakes and I wonder if there's something that we should cherish that we should appreciate or should be condemned and run away from our mistakes.

The retake it as a learning lesson or two egotist feel like we are. Failure like we were getting like it didn't get us there. That's just life. Life is full of challenges and always be an opportunity to try and try again in Iowa Sadie persistence pays so if you fail, I always tell people try and try again because it is after making an error that you do there that you do it right and then you can continue all here in this world together and we all have challenges that challenge as far as what helps us grow.

For example, I have my challenges just recently I was in trial for five days. This trial had to do. It happened three years ago with my daughter almost getting killed.

She had gotten the roommate from Craigslist who had stayed in her house for two weeks and on Valentines 2016. He tried to kill her. He choked her, crushed her skull against the floor. Many times, breaking her school, her little bones. I her nose her mouth and then he cut up her face. She did all that and it was terrible that such a thing could happen. It's incredible. And then you have to realize that you have to appreciate life for what it is because after all, after he tried to kill my daughter and get back God provided a miracle and she left. I think God she lives in.

After being in court and seen evidence and learning all the things I didn't know discovering that it was much worse than I thought. I realized just what a huge miracle. It was that she was alive but it doesn't come with consequences in court. That's the physical stuff that's what you can see the noun for the rest of our life. She slept with the unseen. But here's the bright side, he will not do this to another girl to another person. No parents will have to suffer like we did and she left to save the rest and jury came back he was found guilty, with premeditated, first-degree attempted murder and false imprisonment, and it was just nice to witness justice in a world that I know can sometimes be unjust and I thought for a moment, no matter what the outcome, it was just nice to see team Danny all these people come together to care so much to put on such a good case and to make it so that this man cannot do such a horrendous thing to someone else. But what they learned from past I learned, unconditional love, existing most people don't know what it's like to live with a brain injured adult and you learn that you just have to love unconditionally that even though a may have changed a few things in a negative light. The imagined scenarios never occurred.

Indeed tell you the truth right wrong or indifferent whether they happened or not, whether it's truthful or not. It doesn't matter that's her perception. So what do you do I used to talk Danny and when she was healing the three years that helped her heal. She would say I love you too.

Three years later, Danny.

I love you.

She responds he manipulated me my whole life and she remembers a happy memory that I do have faith in God and I know that this too shall pass.

And people say time heals all wounds.

Yes time does heal all wounds, but just like someone who has a condition, a medical condition that chronic cannot be cured. This something that I don't know enough about the only thing that I read recently is that with severe brain injuries. It does get better. But then it gets bad again and the prognosis is unknown.

You don't know. I don't think it's something that cures by itself and I don't think there is a carefree, how can I help her right now it's hard for the brain injured person to realize they need help and all I can do is pray that everything in life is learning lesson. This is the girl that I fought for all my life and had I not been in a position with the custody battles that I felt that the general master was going to go away. I would not have known that I can write a motion and make use of general master. Sometimes things have to happen for you to discover what you're capable of. Situations happen for you to realize how to be more understanding and more loving, and so the road just goes like that. Meanwhile, I mean come. She found it interesting that it was important to make mistakes that that's how you succeed in life and that's how you move forward and he was our guest today but were waiting for him to call then. So I thought I'd spend some time with you guys and let you know you're not alone. We decipher we are suffering that everything that I didn't do. I have learned from from and you come to think why so many years of suffering. Why 14 use of the custody battle will maybe it took that long for me to finally get it. Who knows I'm still trying to figure it out but what it what you tell me about your successes and your failures out. Tell me, actually you have something you can share with us how many times have we had to start over and over and over again. Did you get it right when the third time is right around while you need to try to learn from your mistakes and go on to give up. You know Ernie just called me. How are you thank you for joining as on garden while you were brought out of the momentum things you thinking of these things happen. It's fine that I was so excited. I was so excited to to speak to you and for those rights are teaching and Ernie is the author of forth doing wrong and he is in the class to build the culture that rocks and he is the founder and president of the better books he can discuss with us how companies can build more freethinking creative cultures had been afraid of failure in seeing errors steps forward to solutions that you got to be willing to get it wrong on your way to get it right and all of us had made mistakes. I tell us about how it is that we have to get it wrong to get it right. Will do. Why that that's how you learn everything right and wrong on the way to get me away, but how we learn to walk. I probably learned or talked of how we learn to make occasional arguments about how we learn and will call you for when were you were encouraged to do the things the right direction. As we get older start giving him a lot of things we do all encouraged the things we do right and for what you try to doing business and in life as you traverse that back in Houston encouraged no longer on the way right learning lesson rather than feeling inadequate you were unable to do it and you are good enough.

I remember when I was a kid and I'm thinking school had to make a portrait of myself and it was the first time I painted and a bit of a perfectionist so because it wasn't perfect. I didn't paint again. I didn't think I was capable and that the mistake is the responsibility we all have not you are still there tomorrow around everyone around us. The responsibility yes responsibility to give encouragement the responsibility of making people feel great about feeling towards and not terrible for one you are very successful. I have to say and I think that's wonderful. I want to talk to you more about this. You have a phrase called feeling up and I want to expand on that and how an organization can operate without motto when we return. For those just tuning in on you host any capital and this is the cure today show is focusing on learning from your mistakes will come back to the cell that have L and this is a care where joined today by Arnie Maha and Dr. boys Nicola were talking about how to have a positive attitude despite the circumstances. I mean, I spoke about the phrase feeling and operating by that motto. Can you expand on that piece will all will not be important in business and family life the past year has been full instructions on my part as a leader quite a good, culture will develop the leader. I understand slippery rules and guidelines of the leader.

I didn't understand how important Jean was to any family or company and so these are all areas we go up we get settled into a because I believe that is power, letting nothing hold you back and I think he said something very important. Teamwork is anything really.

We do need to we can't really.

I mean, if this is an island alone. I don't think he would survive. But teamwork is angling and keeping the harmony now.

How could you encourage your team when they're feeling what I things that you tell them to keep the spirit up to one of abundance. You believe that everyone know about the real world we all went together in the second one is a concert I will trust your team what we strive for everyday working environment where everyone walked in the work at a very high level of everyone at work was there to help them get better and the inverse of that walking that will rebuild your there to help everyone around you get better will come in with confidence that the people around them because they know they have accomplished their journey and we found that positive attitude as opposed to me barrel Malone's race of their altering from our entire business forward. Yes I think that's how entrepreneurs are trying to keep the office culture positive when mistakes multiply. I know that we have an office and we do have meetings and we like to hear the concerns of those who work with us and we like to hear IDS. Another part of the team what some of the things that you that some of them main things that you can outline that you outlined in your workbook to change someone's outlook.

Let's say from a pessimistic point of view to an optimistic point of view negative to positive culture group culture medium culture or that would have. You have a culture knocking on what I've seen is every culture has a leader not leader.

The leader of. We walked a lot with the leaders of boo to help them understand one thing culture will flex leadership. If you don't have the culture you want. You're not, you need to be here sometimes, but I wasn't about 10 years and my business journey and most junior leaders realize they have almost lost the ability to create the culture they want.

The faster we can get all the wind know that you have the right culture not in the wrong environment.

Great question because an individual makes the day are not compatible with the culture. Robinette culture maybe maybe maybe not for them. Realizing you use in the values don't align that the major issue in your body to live as a leader if you hiring people or keeping people values don't align with yours is a major problem when I thought about values we can deepen those you want to believe the same thing in terms of how how the workforce power and molecular teammate. It's real hard to do you want, I think that is important that samples sample, and I think that everyone must follow suit and I think that that would help and get some some kind of guidance. I think it has to start with the person Jean you know doing the right thing and I know that some cut overhead. The right people and hate your job you might be a manager you went and found the right people but how about your culture. The white people find you not make life better if we could create a culture we want our company culture down as opposed to always trying to be "like people, I would push out your audience to think about all of you creating the culture you want to attract the right people working in a culture not not make you a better person a better human being in today's job market every opportunity. Article does a culture that aligns with you, you don't find the right people need screen that person to become the right people writing skills but you can't train the trainer artist computer graphics people we can be better writers and thinkers we can we can train we can train and educate the best of the three values are a whole different story.

I find important is persistence and determination are the work release.

Never give up all yes and I don't know any. It is difficult because even though I'm the president it's Boris who runs and it's so much fun he gets to be the bad guy. Not me, but we try not to be that guy because I believe the old school scene you get more bees with honey. Stop balancing your boss that I don't like to be about you focus on making my people better human being that on the day like in our company a better company acknowledgment companies employ hundreds of people. My job every day to come and I will make this a work environment will not people can only job form I will micromanage and tell them what to do only give them the tools and equipment in the environment and your success will often work with people and they make a mistake. We noticed the mistakes but when do we stop and take notice for some great or the spot outside the box to something to be a knowledge to be sacred to encourage I think that's important course that is program after program mission, we got all come close to what we are looking everyone in the business. No.

And while they did it and we celebrate in public to recognize the fact that no one gets in trouble for making a habit of failure always encouraged to learn from it and walked forward to working with success should be used part of your weekly and monthly cycle recognizing and letting people know it's okay is also a good way.

After all, we are human and we can continue talking to become listening to the chair with Amy, live every Friday at 2 PM on and Colin 55415055412350 please, share how you can stay positive and I'm here to join Dr. Boersma glove and Arnie man.

I mean, when it comes to prioritizing success moving forward or drawing from your observations.

What are some or experiences to business often get into trouble when they tried to diversify rather than maximizing the strengths on its long, and what you do everything you do and focus on what we we we grew very niche categories. We also grew our people in very graphic designers work great graphic designers and on how well lighting windows will why don't how will graphic design or video video is on how well bought media time like specializing gave you all in advantage in the things leaders make us money to live a lovely walk or fulfill a copy.

I believe in.

This is only just something that you can try things that don't. But how do you identify your strength so you have one you a lot about how things are good at computers with your strength something strange: something to string brings you joy when you do you take pride in the work time goes by quickly. You feel honored to do activity, and not stressed over interview drained from or certainly so what brings you joy is most likely a strength just something you happen to be good at.

So basically, ceiling accomplished and Saltzstein positive. In other words, doing something or other weather just be being productive. I understand what I'm proud of you proud of your work. You're more likely more and more like what you know See your best everything. He also said be courageous enough to cheer all these things are of good value and we have the wrong idea. You know, we think we want things easy. No natural there is no merit whenever part of ourselves. When we do something easy that something can do something that when we can do something difficult and we do it well and it was hard work and what part of ourselves.

Then our self-esteem. We feel like were capable of doing something great great one. You know you helped build momentum with the team on the field, whether it's late in the office or family member post you when you cheer someone for the formula serves as all back to abundance and not important to build.

It's important to get things going. I like to say that Boris takes care of us apart. The business aspect and I take care of making sure everyone is happy to know his name is his book worth doing wrong right and other points but come on Arnie Shalit that how did you wrong. I know a lot about this a lot of great rules for people to do it my way and not their way.

More about really work is good that my great okay that was the business I created for myself what will happen in the culture reflects leadership came to know of the presentation by a gentleman named John, did you customer service experts on the planet and he utters those words culture like it was in that moment that I realized I was the leader in the culture I had that one. What are my inability to deal and that moment we started making changes to how we treated our people. How we help you job on valuing people not the change we made in the middle right should be should be there even though you put them as a guideline, but when this will be having organization without specific rules when I hear you know Probably rules you want one person does something wrong doing that again and one in a negative way. Guidelines almost always write you one person long, we have correct their behavior, not I don't know.

I mean culture you mean by collection of police. Everyone leaving the same values and having seen what correct core values we don't ask. Remember home values were no major. Don't let them make decisions work as a part of your culture as well. You work part of a culture where were all going where we tried to get.

He business. What are the audacious goal share value should we share office and we share encouragement. Those that are culture like anyone know having values having a nation and having job on make for a much better than one that has no values, no, nation rules about what makes a successful saying I love that makes a book worth reading. Any yes it's very important that the people that we work with that they feel like the part of the team and down important and should I teaching something because I thought that rules more important and because I'm a law follower. I like to do things by the book and do things right and amicable father and that is a very unique way of looking dip in the guideline in the guideline of how to do it better and will be new for one more ability we can get our people in terms of work where they work, how they work and give them a path and not that you have to do it this way. That flexibility makes people so like they need to move your life forward and we believe it all way of thinking again after worker doing exactly what you want to do it. That's just not the will and not that our young workforce one you have something to do and they don't do it or do it differently than at that point you accept any idea what you ask and I need to get this way and tell me why you did it this way or how you go about that part better, not better. Not you want to be doing encourage people to approach that is exactly why this way and I will trot another way on the quality you know how to do it wrong. They can finally get it right and it's just how people just possible that one of your long life should be better so it's worth doing wrong doing people.

We need people to lead all that was my next question and tell everyone they had to really talk about next month like reading read you will read when you do you just tell me a little bit about the book and what to read how to read. I read something come back and tell me about it so over the years. You paid out thousands of dollars for people to read books that make them better human being getting paid by Amazon. Something doesn't know what we become better users feel better company work better. People make better company collection of people and people we grew our company and you haven't come up with all the big ideas because they were reading books and we didn't care whether those books make them a better parent a better style, but it was a funny looking godly or great business advertising, marketing, writing long improving his people.

We were glad to pay them about. On average, about $100 a book. Each person would on three to $500 a year just about reading now.

Crazy people with a fraction of the cost to send someone to a conference or seminar and they retain some smile. Not only are you helping the business and helping yourselves also helping them talk about the fact that they were reading class to exercise the brain believed the point confident to take that knowledge and become better human business coach once said, accountability, responsibility and ownership of the line that by not blame excuses and denial of the line so that she wanted to install and start with the valleys above line that this company went from making nothing to making millions just on the principle alone. We want to give people every chance to be close to only one chance, one can't produce stress, anxiety, and give them no chances were cheerful all the point where we are all in the wrong place. We've been given every opportunity to be successful and success is knocking to come this time. At this place. I'm not suggesting you go beyond that reasonable boundaries what I am suggesting lower anxiety and pressure in the workplace. As you increase flexibility, thinking things happen.

I think that the people we work with will pay Mark thanks into the training for the study is likely to change for you if you things you want more and you don't think so. My stinky so much for your idea. I'm definitely got the worst thing because I certainly have learned a lot from you today and we come to an end. Unfortunately, I feel free to come back to the cell anytime. I'd love to learn some more, and for more any more information guys can go to Amy,.com and your guests and you can find Arnie's book, and any information that you would like to have this has been the chair and you host any capital. Thanks for listening, life can bring many difficult situations, domestic violence, addictions, poverty and even sexual abuse by your loved ones. The issue is not stay there, but to overcome all obstacles show that with the love of God, your husband and your family. You can succeed. Love is the answer. God is the key work reveals from a very sincere and honest position. Amy Carbo's life warrior who didn't give up and achieve the dream of her life. You can get to know more about her at her story on buying her book on If you suffer from persistent depression called neurosciences medical clinic to schedule a free consultation for new, effective FDA approved treatment such as intranasal ketamine or Norstar TMS. No medication treatment neurosciences medical clinic call now 786-600-7005 neurosciences medical clinic 786 600-700-5786 600-7005 with Amy, was brought to you by IM IC research 786-310-7477 or every Friday at 2 PM with Amy, right here on 880

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